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Loving the One who Gave her Life.


One year ago today I wrote a blog post titled “Six Months." On June 15, 2017 Kevin and I had officially been a waiting family for six months. Today, exactly one year later, we have a seven month old daughter. My mind sometimes just doesn’t quite comprehend that this is real life.

The first line of that blog post reads: It’s not that we love waiting; it’s that we love the one we are waiting for.

That was a truth that God had given us – it’s the little bit of hope we had to hold onto. Gosh, waiting was hard, but if it meant waiting on the little one He had planned for us, we would do it.

Little did we know that at that time, the birth mother who would choose us just 5 months later, she was carrying our daughter. Emmarie would have been in her birth mama’s womb for approximately 2 months this time last year. And they, they were states away. Birth mama “C” is from Alabama. We weren’t even in the same state. If someone would have told me that the woman who would choose us to parent her child didn’t even live here in Ohio, I would have never believed it.

Looking back now, it’s amazing to think of all that the Lord was doing behind the scenes; working in ways that only He can, orchestrating a beautiful story that we would soon be a part of.

Emmarie’s birth mom moved to Ohio just weeks before Emmarie was born. “C” was involved in an abusive relationship and had acquaintances here, no family, just a few friends. She bravely packed up her and her three kid’s things, and left. She didn’t have a plan, she just needed to get away from the danger that she and her children were in. “C” didn’t know she was pregnant. The weekend before Emmarie was born, “C” went to Miami Valley Hospital’s ER, she was having some problems, became very sick and didn’t realize that her water had broke; because again, she didn’t know she was pregnant.

I can’t imagine the fear and loneliness that she felt in that moment. This wasn’t planned. She had three other babies to take care of. I do believe that in the very moment she found out she was carrying a child, that she loved her, and that she hoped everything would be okay. I am sure she was scared – she had no one. It was just her, this innocent unborn baby, and the hospital staff.

Over the next couple days, the hospital administered antibiotics and medications hoping to clear the infection, and help “C” and her baby. They were both very sick.

Tuesday, November 14, 2017 at 10:34pm, after a successful c-section, Samantha Marie was born. “C” gave her that name, but knew she wanted her adoptive family to name her, since they would be the one to parent her.

I am sure “C” had so many thoughts after her baby was born. Could she do it? Could she parent an 18 month old, a 3 year old and a 4 year old? I am sure she put so much thought into how she could make this work, because again, this wasn't something she planned for. I am sure that her decision wasn’t a quick one, and I am sure she cried, and struggled through one of the toughest decisions of her life that night.

We know that she spent hours looking through profile books, only to narrow it down to two: ours and one other family’s. We know that she spent just as much time praying over those profile books, and her decision as she did looking through those pictures, and reading the words we put on those pages.

I am so thankful for her decision. I am so thankful she listened to the Lord speaking to her that night. I am so thankful for her bravery and selflessness. She put Emmarie’s needs above her own. “C” knew that she was not in a place to provide Emmarie with the life she deserved. So she made a plan. She handpicked us to parent her beautiful child.

And here we are 7 months later, enjoying life with our little one. I am grateful…so, so grateful. I love reliving this story over and over. Every day she is a reminder of what God has done for us. Every day I look at Emmarie, I thank God for her, and for her brave birth mom.

I am also thankful for our change of heart in regards to open adoption. An open adoption scared us. But we can’t possibly imagine traveling this road without Emmarie’s birth mom. How could we love Emmarie, but not love the one who gave her life?

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