rooted and grounded in love.

I don't want to forget any of this. I want to remember the long drives to the hospital. The long days spent at in the NICU. I want to remember the smell of her room, and every little detail. Life is a series of fleeting moments, but these are ones I never want to forget. I want to remember all the work we had to go through each and every day just to get to her. Our early mornings always start out with a phone call to the NICU, where I say, "hi there, I am Miss Emmarie's adoptive mama, room 20** - and our code word is ________. Could we speak with her nurse to get an update on how she did throughout the night?" And then we were transferred to her floor where the nurse answered, and I again gave the same information. We then would hear how her night went, and most every time the nurse would say "she's a feisty little one!" And with a smile, I would say, "yes, our sweet girl is a feisty little babe!" We always have gotten good reports - she...

Oh what amazing things this last week has held. This time last week I had no idea that I would become a mama that day. As tears stream down my face, I am overwhelmed with such joy, such happiness, such thankfulness, and so much sadness, all at the same time. Our lives have forever been changed, and not just because of our sweet Emmarie, but because of the selfless choice her birth mother made, by placing her little life in our hands.  In adoption a child isn’t given up, a birth mother gives life, she gives her child a family, and unconditional love. She gives a part of her heart that will never feel whole. She gives another mama a part of her heart that was always missing. Adoption is about loss, but it’s also about great love. Great, great love.  Looking back over the past fifteen months of our life, and even over the last almost thirteen years of being together; I think on everything that has led up to this time in our lives.  I think of why we weren't able ...

The last 72 hours have been a whirlwind. A little before 5pm on Tuesday, we got a text from Angela, the Director at Choosing Hope. She asked if we had any more profiles. We had an extra profile book at home that we had for ourselves, and so we said yes, and she asked our address. I told Kevin I felt like she was coming over to get it, and wondered what was going on. Sure enough, Angela showed up just moments later; ready to pick up our profile book. She explained that a few days prior, a birth mom came in, interested in adoption, and our profile book is one of the ones she sent home with her. Meanwhile, Tuesday, Angela got a call about a situation where a baby was being born that night by c-section, and mom was considering adoption. Angela left for the hospital, and we found ourselves anxiously awaiting any news. As the evening went on, we were given few details about the situation, but would know more tomorrow (Wednesday). Wednesday came, and we were given the following i...

One year ago today, we were completing our fourth and final homestudy. Just a short month later would find out that we were homestudy approved. It's been a long year in some ways, but I remember the whirlwind of it all in the beginning, just like it was yesterday. So many requirements to be met, and me; I want to have everything done right now, and done the right way the first time. And now, some days are just quiet. Very quiet. Going into adoption, we knew we'd be faced with a wait. We went into this process knowing that the average wait in adoption is one to two years. Does knowing that make it any easier enduring the wait? Not at all. However, we know that in time, this calling to adoption that was placed on our lives, will all come together. And when it does, we will understand the things that right now we do not. Over the past year while getting calls about potential situations, both with Choosing Hope Adoptions, and the National Down Syndrome Adoption Network, saying ...